If there’s one skill worth improving continuously, it’s listening.
As an executive, a manager, a spouse, a parent — or simply as a human being — your ability to truly listen can make or break deals, relationships, trust, and even your own self-awareness.
Listening happens in the moment — yet most of us are habitually occupied with thoughts from the past or worries about the future.
It’s an intentional activity that demands empathy, patience, and the willingness to respond thoughtfully to what we hear.
True listening is mentally taxing. It requires you to quiet — or better yet, stop — your own inner dialogue.
This can be especially challenging when complex or emotional topics are at play, often leading us to take mental shortcuts or disengage altogether.
Even the most well-intentioned leaders sometimes fall into the trap of poor listening.
Five Common Pitfalls That Undermine Good Listening
1. Haste
Asking for input at the very end of a meeting, or while on the move, rarely yields meaningful dialogue. Even with the best intentions, it often leaves people feeling unheard and frustrated. If time is truly short, it’s better to acknowledge that and plan a proper follow-up rather than rush through a conversation. Hastiness also leads to interruptions — which inevitably undermine trust.
2. Defensiveness
When employees raise concerns or offer critical feedback, defensiveness is a natural — but damaging — reaction. True leadership means calming your emotions, validating what the other person is sharing, and seeking to understand before trying to be understood. Take a breath. Slow yourself down. Ask clarifying questions before you respond.
3. Invisibility
If you seem distracted, fail to maintain eye contact, don’t nod or reflect back what’s being said, or don’t follow up on issues that were raised, people can feel invisible. Even when you are working hard behind the scenes, without visible communication, morale and trust decline.
4. Exhaustion
When you are exhausted, your ability to focus, process, and engage meaningfully diminishes. Managing your energy is just as important as managing your time. If necessary, reschedule meetings or rotate input rounds among more people to stay fresh and attentive.
5. Inaction
Hearing concerns but failing to act on them can erode trust completely.
Listening is not just about receiving information — it’s about showing, through action, that what you heard matters.
True Listening goes even beyond words
Can you also listen to what is not being said ? Do you hear the gap between the words? Do you hear and feel the energy behind the communication? And perhaps most important, can you hear yourself at the same time?
Become an objective observer of your own inner world. At all times.
Learn to listen to the silence. Learn to listen to the beating of your heart and the flow of your breath.
Yoga, breathwork, and meditation help you slow down and fully inhabit the present moment—skills that are essential to becoming a truly attentive listener and effective leader.
According to the Japji, listening is not just a communication skill — it is the ultimate existential answer.
- Through listening, all questions are answered.
- Through listening, all knowledge becomes known.
- Through listening, the unreachable becomes reachable.
- Through listening, you ultimately reach the highest state of bliss, and all sin and sorrow are destroyed.
“Curious what true listening can do for you? Check out the Master Your Mind experience here.”
Inspired by insights from the Harvard Business Review and the timeless wisdom of the Japji on the power of listening.
